of Piracy

Taking many of the elements and experience I've gained from mixing media, this series of articles exist to...exist. They prove many points, but don't particularly look to "impress." Its bite sizes of entertainment, information, culture, and media in one big Seinfeldian lump.

It looks crazy, but so does normal news media today. They don't quite connect the dots anymore, in general, and this too is just a reflection of that zeitgeist.

GLM has brought together a bunch of different views through different mediums in an attempt to enhance your understanding of Piracy as it is now and was yesterday. GLM's Editorial Input has not been approved by the FDA and is not intended to cure, treat, or prevent any other ideology. Everything in life often connects, overlaps, and reflects one another.

Piracy, obviously, is not new. Since man has had ships and sea access he has brought it upon himself to attack other men and take the riches of many. From Edward Teach to the Vikings in the Middle Ages, piracy is indeed a great way to earn a decent living....until you make one mistake and you're hanging by a noose.

From buckshot to grapeshot, to RPGs and terrorism, piracy and various pirates have used many tools in their trade of debauchery. Lets take a look, then, at the pirates shown above and what tools they have used to go about their dirty democratic deeds.

Pirates are most well known for being terrorists of the seven seas. Blackbeard, for instance, coveted his "flagship" known as The Queen Anne's Revenge. It was originally built, according to Wikipedia, in 1710 and captured by the French just a year after it originally left dry dock originally christened by the Royal Navy as the "Concord." It was a large vessel, originally built to carry slaves.

Very few people realize that pirates often were very democratic--in fact , throughout the "Golden Age" of piracy these ships and bands of privateers were often the best poster child for democracy.

Blackbeard himself actually didn't capture the Concord, that distinction belongs to Captain Benjamin Hornigold. He later gave the ship to Blackbeard and as often as pirates do, Edward Teach's boys re-named the ship and modified it with plenty of fire power.

In the video game series "Monkey's Island" Guybrush Threepwood is a downtrodden average guy who just wants to become a famous pirate. Throughout his travels in the first few iterations of the game swords are often presented in a fight....however due to the lack of computer processing power in the early days and the inventiveness of the publisher LucasArts the ability to swing a sword at your opponent in this game series wasn't key to your success. Learning all the insults hurled at you during sword play and their correct responses ultimately allowed you to defeat your enemies. Non-violent and funnier than the demise of Calico Jack.

Napster was the killer app for the internet. No, really ....did you want to crawl the interweb and read articles all day? Many people I know didn't care about that silly invention by Al Gore [-ed. note: Not actually ever said by him. ] until they heard they could get FREE music!

Shawn Fanning created a program with a new idea and technology that allowed computer users to share music with each other. Quickly , layman's caught on to this cool idea and began to spend hours over primitive dial-up and slower broadband connections than we have today. All to hear that latest Brittany Spears song.

Napster has since been reborn as a legitimate service, after being beaten half to death in the courts by the Recording Industry Association of America .

[Its interesting to note that it (the RIAA) was originally created in 1952 simply at first to learn how to set down standards to improve the sound of vinyl records.

And now they're busy suing their "customers"; the elderly, the dead, the too young, the computer illiterate, and college students.]

Pirates and Privateers often hailed each other for news, getting and passing on their latest headlines. Or better yet... they went to the local tavern while in port to "share" these things, often over a few acapella songs.

Disney had a great idea once. They figured that since soooo many people loved their amusement park attraction The Pirates of the Caribbean they then assumed that with their name-brand recognition they would be able to sell it at the movie theater.

And it worked , as we all know.

Pirates of yesteryear advertised their name brands through flags, often referred to "Jolly Roger's." The reasoning behind this behavior was that if a pirate gained enough reputation through boasts and scare tactics, then their targets who saw their Jolly Roger flag would be too busy crapping their pants to want to fight. Much, anyway.

Tales of (good ole' Eddy) Teach portray the historical character at times weaving smoke emitting sticks into his hair, lighting them, and coming aboard to look a captain in his eyes and say "I am the Devil, and I've come to take you to hell!"

Many of us are glad that Captain of the Maersk Richard Phillips is now on his way to his family after giving up himself to spare the freedom of the rest of his crew. Somalian pirates, however, have been active in the news since 2005 . Its really nothing new , its just remarkable to us especially now because a US Vessel was attacked.

But its interesting to note....just like in the golden age of robbery on the high seas Somalia as a nation is in governmental disrepair. In the colonial era, for instance, it wasn't uncommon for colonies to change governmental hands on seemingly a regular basis.

This is because, much like the Knights (who at one point were told to seek out the Holy Land because they were really just a bunch of swords-for-hire with no other skills than..well, killing and pillaging. When the Middle Ages ended they had nothing to do...accept..well, kill and pillage the villages around them.) pirates, too, fulfilled a function in colonial government. Many nations issued what is known as "Letters of Marque," a proclamation by a governor that said Captain was able to attack a nation's vessels, commandeer its cargo, and go about its business in the eyes of whatever nation gave the marque legally . So as long as the Governor and King got their share, too, of course.

And if they didn't give the Nation its due, a Privateer would overnight be called...what class? A pirate.

Captain Robert is the captain of the airship pirating vessel the Ophelia. The band, taking its cues from the late 1800s (but making it "futuristic") has found an interesting niche in music, and have indeed become quite the leaders of the so-called "Steampunk" art movement in their field.

By utilizing their talents they fictionally attack people with the Ophelia by surprise since they are clearly one of the few known airship pirates of our (fictional history) day. Their weapon is music, theatrics, and a burlesque-like stage show.

All of their instruments have been personally hand crafted or modified, as well as their manner of dress.

This concludes GLM's thought bubbles of piracy.